More photo goodness

I should have added NYJLM’s 365 photoblog to my post the other day.  She is great with the macro, and unusual angles.  And I am jealous in winter of her Florida home.

Where are you on your journey?

I’ve been behind on my reading of all the blogs I so enjoy, and just caught up with this entry by Susan Carlin, about her journey to becoming a full-time artist.  Susan’s a gifted, gifted painter, with an eye for emotion and expression, but she can turn a phrase quite nicely, too, and I enjoyed her story of how she came to more fully realize that everything else that she is and does aside, the call to her art is strong enough to win, and to succeed.

Neat photography sites

I am quite fond of Janet’s photos at Fond of Snape, and anything MelanieBeanPaste deigns to turn her camera upon o’er at Beanpaste turns to gold, but I am also very much enjoying the daily photo blog called The Noticing Project. Two friends take a photo each every day, and the results are consistently lovely, thoughtful, amazing, interesting, provocative, and just neato.

Other great blogger photographers whose work I enjoy include the rock stars Schmutzie and Amanda Soule at SouleMama.  Aimee Greeblemonkey, Lotus Carroll, and ApK, all contacts in my FlickR photostream (click on the Flickr box on the right) are also very gifted photographers, as is LawyerMama and the others in my ’stream.

Hope you see some beauty this weekend, through a view finder or not.  The Better Half and I are off together to play Old Home Weekend in Western Massachusetts, visiting the place where we first lived and some of our old haunts.

Bacon Friday

Single serving spinach salad, originally uploaded by BipolarLawyerCook.

Last night’s supper, a spinach salad with warm bacon vinaigrette, heavy on the protein. I was feeling the need for minerals and fat– I suppose another sign I am feeling better, and that the horrible carb cravings of medication withdrawal are passing.

To make: I de-stemmed, tore, washed & dried some Boston Organics spinach, and topped it with chopped cherry tomatoes, hard boiled egg slices, and pieces of crisped bacon. I made little slices out of (one medium or) two small potatoes, and fried the slices until crisp in the bacon fat left in the pan. Set the potatoes to drain on the same paper bag where you’ve put your bacon. To the liquid bacon fat still in your frying pan (I actually added a little olive oil, as the potatoes had absorbed a lot), over medium heat, add almost an equal amount of red wine vinegar, a little salt and pepper, bring to a boil, reduce, and then pour over your salad, tossing to coat. The spinach will wilt a little in the hot dressing.

To make this lower carb, use zucchini matchsticks, or white turnip matchsticks, or sweet potato matchsticks, likewise fried until turning golden.

Janet at Fond of Snape asked me which bacon I use– when I can, I buy Niman Ranch uncured, hickory smoked at Trader Joe’s.  When I can’t, I have Farmland brand bacon, uncured, applewood smoked, that you can buy at Stop & Shop or Roche Bros.

Enjoy!

Love Thursday– A cup of tea, a wireless connection, and thou

… or y’all, for my southern readers. What you see above is one of my favorite places—at my computer, with you, emailing with you, IMing with you, writing for you, reading your posts and comments, drinking my tea and enjoying the pleasure of your company.

When I started this blog, it was as a woman thrashing, drowning, clutching at the shore, far off. I felt alone, isolated by my bipolar and my erstwhile functionality, lost for the moment. I’d been used to being the social secretary, the project manager, the mom, the best friend, the best wife, the organizer. And then, I couldn’t. When I started the blog, almost two years in to my diagnosis, I still wasn’t sure I’d make it, and I wasn’t at that time finding support in the support groups around– since it’s not a disease that those who aren’t either sufferers themselves or direct caregivers can ever fully get. I was no longer of the people who’d been moderately functional most of their lives– suddenly, blammo, I’d lost it. Lost it, like it was my fault, all of a sudden.

Except the bipolar wasn’t sudden—just unrealized, unnoticed, stealth madness, if you will. Creeping, cumulative, accelerated, suddenly hit-the-wall crazy, alone, unhappy. I wasn’t, but I felt that way. So I started the blog to journal it through, though I was not expecting to find readers. I was not expecting to find comfort from my blog, just catharsis, though I’d found relief in the raw honesty of bloggers like Dooce—I started not really knowing what to expect, at all. I think I was hoping to provide some information, some comfort, some you’re-not-alone-ness to others, but mostly, I was hoping to provide it to myself, stopping the circling doubts by getting them Out There. Hoping, but not sure I wouldn’t still feel a little lonely, misunderstood. Especially since I wasn’t then sure how out I could afford to be in “real life” about my illness, my disorder, my bane.

Instead, I’m blessed beyond belief, beyond compare. Readers found me, friends found me, I found friends to read, and some of you have trusted me with incredibly hard secrets, in email or in comments. Thank you. Thank you for sharing, for encouraging, for believing, for rooting, for asking for help, for responding, for being that new number in the stat count, new ISP in my Google Analytics, being There. And Here. Every time I open my Reader, open my comments email account, and every time I open “Write New Post.” You’ve made me braver, saner, more Out in real life, more who I am Here that I was afraid to be There. The blog and Real Life are converging, and Real Life is better as a result– amazingly, most “real” people have been great, just like you. But I might have not known that—except by creating here, coming here, and sticking it out, with my wireless connection, a cup of tea and thou—who are with me all the time. All the way. Thank you. And happy Love Thursday.

You can see more Love Thursday posts here, at Shutter Sisters.

Tumbleweeds

An assortment of things in my head right now…

I am enjoying the new/old chair with the fancy upholstered seat my friend L. re-cycled to me after getting a new dining set. It’s just the right height and depth for sitting at the table with my legs up on the chair across from me, while I blog and write away.

Tulips are the lollipops of the flower world. Either that, or gerbera daisies. But tulips in Boston are blooming, and the yards are full of lollipops.

Water, Emergen-C, Yogi Tea’s peach detox tea, sports drink. Pee, rinse, repeat.

Downloaded the new NIN album, free online at their site. It’s awesome– I lurve Trent Reznor.

The lady at the grocery store with the screaming, ear-infected infant who took time out of her busy day to castigate me for my made-in-China chinese mary janes, decorated with cute neon buttons by little old moi, didn’t like it when I asked her back, “do you understand the carbon impact of bringing another human into the world?” I like kids, really, but when you’re toting yours in a $1000 stroller? Holier-than-thou 0- sarcasm 1.

Had a wonderful massage last night with lots of lymph drainage work. I am a snotty mess this morning, but I feel worlds better on the withdrawal end of things. Almost like myself, just with a toxin-release-induced cold. I’ll take it. Why isn’t massage prescribed for every bipolar in drug toxicity withdrawal? It should be a standard of care. I will ask my doctor Friday.

Eating BBQ for breakfast

…for an upcoming Memorial Day Weekend story.  Gosh, I had no idea the sacrifices I would have to make for this freelancing gig!  Especially since I hate breakfast food, and love cornbread.  It’s tough, I tell you.  Tough.  But not the collards.  Those, those are silky and ham-hocky.  Mmmm.  Ham hock.

White, closeup, two

White, closeup, two, originally uploaded by BipolarLawyerCook.

I had the chance to meet up with Sara of Moving Right Along (and her equally amazing friends Dena and Sylvia) on Sunday at my own Jamaica Plain’s Arnold Arboretum. Sara got to break in her new prosthetic leg, earned with battle scars after her most recent cancer-go-round, and we got to enjoy the wash of color and scent that the lilacs in full and partial bloom gifted us. Sara is a pistol, and it was amazing to meet, in real life, someone whose writing, whose humor, whose bravery, and whose sheer obstinacy in the face of scary, scary stuff has wowed me from the safety of my computer screen. Sometimes you wonder if the blogger’s “voice” will translate into how they are in person– it was just great to verify that the best writing comes from a place of truth, and that you can judge a blogger by her blog– or at least Sara’s truth is the same, online and in person.

There are lots more photos of the flowers over at my Flickr account– you can click on the link above on my name.

This week’s Real Mental post

This week’s post, “Mornings are better” is a series of thoughts on this withdrawal I’ve been going through, as well as a link to an important and thought-provoking article in the NYT about the “Mad Pride” movement.

The First Annual BLC Ice Cream Social

Mark your calendars, and thank Michelle for the suggestion.  The first annual BipolarLawyerCook Ice Cream Social will take place the afternoon of June 28, 2008.  I will have lots of ice cream, but please BYO favorite flavors, and we’ll do what bloggers and commenters do best– talk amongst ourselves, argue about what’s best, and enjoy some tasty snacks while enjoying one another’s company.  Even if you’ve always lurked, and never left a comment, you’re invited.  It’s Boston, it’s summer, and dadgummit, there is ice cream to be consumed.  I know you are up to the challenge.  Time and location, TBA, but probably at my house or a nearby park with picnic facilities.  (Umm, sweetie?  I planned something for June 28…)